the place
--
every time i think i arrive
i don’t
when everything feels abundantly clear
it isn’t
when i think i am safe
i am not
and love is in short demand
the world is broken
my heart too
and i wait
the struggle
the sorrow
the anxiety of tomorrow
where will i be
i cannot see that far in the distance
so i walk
and walk
and i feel a peace
in the journey
that does not end
does not begin
but i feel a pulling
a voice calling me
to a place
to unpack my dreams
and in the middle of everything
i call your name
and in the rustle of trees
i think i heard yes
and in the expectation
of a tomorrow of mostly no
i create a flow
and i let things go
my heart too
so to feel everything
is to feel sorrow and joy
in the same moment
and to know i am at home
the place i have not known
the path
the gate
the line in the sand
a new past
a now
at last
to know that i am
everything painted in my childhood
how i began
i can now return to that feeling
again and again
so don’t drag me to your church
instead lead me to the blue wide open sea
maybe an endless field of wildflowers
laced by leafy green shade trees
that is my sanctuary
my peace
the places
the empty spaces
where the invisible god
the beating heart
of the universe
will come and sit
and break bread
with only me.
~ patty brown
art — ”blue ridge pines” -erin hanson
